Learn to unlearn

We as human beings are capable of unlearning if we are capable of learning. 
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It was the Greek philosopher Antisthenes who said, “The most useful piece of learning for the uses of life is to unlearn what is untrue.” As I age, I realise how important it is to unlearn many of the things that I have been taught from my childhood. Like a peace skill that would make us wise, we need to learn to unlearn at every point of our life.

The most important thing necessary for unlearning is an open mind. An adamant heart and mind can never unlearn. When you know something is untrue, a person with an open mind will be quick to start the process of unlearning. This eventually leads to knowledge and also peace in all relationships. People who refuse to unlearn lose these beautiful things. In most cases, they refuse to unlearn not because they do not see the truth but because they only want to see what they want to see and not the truth.

When I was delivered of my two babies, I was strictly forbidden from stepping out of the house unnecessarily by my parents. Of course, their concern for my health was understandable. I too thought that was the best thing for a new mother. But now I know that it is not true. Being cloistered inside a house for days at length is not good for your mental health. Even taking a walk outside for 10 minutes in not-so-crowded places helps a new mother to deal well with her post-partum mental health.

In India, politicians cleverly use the caste card in every election. The so-called honour killings are dime a dozen in this country even now. Sections of people still would like to believe that they are superior because of the caste or creed into which they are born. Isn’t it high time we learned to unlearn this? Shouldn’t we evolve as a better society?

Thirty years ago, parents in every middle class household in India wanted to educate their wards so that they start earning well and have a rosy future. Education was seen as a tool to earn money. Now we have unlearned a few things. Both mental and physical health are getting prioritised and children are encouraged to develop skills of their choice and excel in them. Hence we see many first-generation entrepreneurs around us. Of course, many of you may argue that all this comes only after some financial stability. Not necessarily. Indian middle-class and even lower middle-class families have evolved and learned to unlearn. Now you can see parents encouraging their children to go after excellence and not monetary improvements alone.

What really stops us from unlearning is a fear of failure. We are so very used to our old ideas that we fear that shedding it and embracing something new may put us into trouble. We as human beings are capable of unlearning if we are capable of learning. We have embraced technology with a bang. We don’t use the same brick-like phones that we used some years ago. We are fast becoming a cashless society, using many payment apps for our convenience. For a society that can adapt to fast technological changes, isn’t it a bit funny that we still cannot come out of our age-old superstitious practices? Is patriarchy so deep in our veins that we are still reluctant to treat our girls as equals? Isn’t it a typical case of our psyche refusing to unlearn? Aren’t marriages still getting arranged after the horoscopes match? Isn’t it high time we recognised that two mature adults should be able to make life’s decisions themselves? It is again the fear factor that deters us from unlearning some of our outdated practices and embrace new things.

If the saying that change is the only constant in the world is true, shouldn’t we add unlearning is the most important thing that human beings must learn to evolve into better human beings? Unlearning is the most positive part of our learning process in life. Every positive development personal or professional, come to us after we prepare ourselves to unlearn and move forward with new ideas and new beliefs.

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