Evolving value systems

Hailing as we do from the orient, one would hope that values does not get forgotten and ignored in the hustle and bustle of our times.
| Photo Credit: SREEJITH R. KUMAR

The other day, in one of my reflective moods, a thought from the past struck me. I was reminded of my grandmother lamenting with more than a tinge of visible sadness that value systems had fallen and things such as love, respect, regard, loyalty, sharing and caring were no longer valued or practised.

As it happens, every statement or discussion is contextual and based on one’s contemporary perspective. As a young man in those days, I viewed her lamentation as no more than what old people tell younger people out of frustration and cumulative nostalgia. Now that I am in my sixties and a senior, I can better understand the import of what my grandmother had said many years ago.

What are values? Retracing our steps when human beings were living in caves and forests, as food gatherers and hunters, a question could be posed. Did values referred to by my grandmother exist even then? My sense is that values essentially get shaped, even if not exclusively, by one’s needs, requirements and advancements of time and society.

It was patriotism that drove and propelled most Indians before Independence. Even industrialists were driven by not just the desire to make money but also to share it for the common good and be a part of the national objectives then.

Sheer survival

After Independence, it became a question of surviving and eking out a living for most Indians. Joint families still formed an integral part of the social fabric, though necessities of migration to urban centres had slowly but steadily started weakening these bonds. The old started getting older even while the young were finding their feet. Geriatric issues, absence and lack of medical care, and loneliness, to mention just a few, contributed to the overall sense of helplessness among the older generation. The natural expectation among them was that the younger lot would chip in and take care of them. This was a “value”, perhaps even more than an expectation, to them. Most members of the younger generation, especially those who had migrated in search of jobs to cities such as Delhi and Mumbai, kept grappling with the need to earn their daily bread while staying true to their elders’ expectations of taking care of them. The country was devoid of job opportunities, waking up as it was from centuries of colonialism. Salaries were meagre and just about everyone had a frugal lifestyle.

Things started changing slowly as the country saw the rise of a private sector which meant more jobs. In stepped comparison and competition. When the loaf of bread was small and the consumers far too many, comparison and competition rode together. “Success” became the most important goal to chase. Development as we know today saw a rather rapid and drastic dilution if not erosion of traditional value systems some of which I have referred to above. Even relationships started becoming transactional.

Many years ago, I remember going down to Kerala for a 10-day vacation after my high school examinations. The moment I reached my native place, I was “greeted” by a frosty grandma who ticked me off without mincing words. “If you were coming only for 10 days, why did you come at all?” Though I winced at this “greeting”, I later realised it was her pure love and affection that made her say that.

The size of the rooms or the sheer number of inhabitants did not matter then. No-one complained about these “trivial” things then, but, of course, in today’s times, it is not so. Children may come and spend a few days or a few hours with their parents and even stay with them at their place if time and convenience permitted.

The wise among the elders accept the change in circumstances and make the best of the situation uncomplainingly. This is not to suggest that children are being insensitive, but they too have quietly moved on. Their children observe and experience these and start getting themselves conditioned to the “new normals”.

While there can and should not be any value judgments on what is good or bad, it goes without saying that value systems are essentially a factor of time, space and context.

However hailing as we do from the orient, one would always wish and hope that values such as love, affection, regard, respect and an understanding shaped by deeper foundations does not get forgotten and ignored in the hustle and bustle of our times.

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